I Want the World
I want the world to shimmer and gleam.
I want it to be lovely and kind. I want the world to be full of love, and everyone hugs, and offers smiles like they’re on sale at the dollar store. I want the world to...
I’M GETTING ATTACKED IN THE STREETS
This is a true story, as we have come to believe, from the blog: It Just Gets Stranger.
Last night I was in bed at a decent hour, proud of myself for having the self-discipline ...
Easter Egg Hunts are Basically Just Cleaning.
From the vaults of: IT JUST GETS STRANGER!
On Saturday night I was out relatively late. Don't tell Bob and Cathie. And NEVER YOU MIND what I was doing! None of your business! My personal scandals shall stay ...
You Might Have Cancer
You called today.
You might have cancer.
You have to wait until Monday to find out because the clinic is closed over the weekend.
You wait.
You found a lump and your doctor “doesn’t think it looks g...
Everything In My House
One laptop, Apple, on my lap. One water bottle, blue. One lamp, next to a pair of blue skull candy headphones (that often short-out) on a table. Two decorative pitchers, new, that were made to look old. They s...
President Nixon Dreams Of Aliens
(A Historical Imagining)
On the afternoon of February 19, 1973 Richard Nixon woke up from a nap and his mind was made up. It was time he shared a secret. As a master of secrets, it was uncommon for him to sh...
15 Beginnings Of An Essay I Will Never Write
1.
My mom used to take me to her psychiatrist appointments. I’d bring Pogs. I was nine. She’d leave me in the waiting room by a wooden bench and a table covered in back issues of The New Yorker. I was always...
